I love my sister!

I just wanted to say how much I love my sister. She is my favorite person in the world and I wish that I could live with her forever. Unfortunately, this won't happen. That's all I wanted to say. O, and she has great taste in chocolate. :)

Prayer Request

I don't want to get my hopes up for fear that the God will close the door. But please pray for me that I can see the open doors and not pound on the closed ones. 1. I am waiting for my health insurance to go through so that I can get up to date on stuff and leave the country with a little more comfort in my health. MN care needed one more piece of info before they could determine if I will be approved or not. I sent in the info today and hopefully the insurance will go through soon.
I need to have my wisdom teeth removed. I need new glasses and contacts that work! I need my shots, who wants to hold my hand? Seriously? I need a full physical before leaving the US, and I think that is it for doctor stuff... 2. After that goes through, I can finish my YWAM applications. YWAM stands for Youth With A Mission. It is a christian organization that enables people to go to other countries, take classes on things like church planting, missions, etc, and then use those skills to evangelize. It's an amazing program, and as of now, the doors are open and as I pray about it, I feel God placing this on my heart for a reason. So, please pray for open doors if this is God's will. And if it isn't in his will for me, then I hope that I can see that and not try to fight it. 3. Please pray for relationships. There are some things I am dealing with that are very stressful at times. I need God's guidance in these matters. That is all I need right now! Thank you all for being so wonderful, I appreciate your prayers and help in these matters.

My rediculous restless night

Ok, let me just tell you a funny story about my lack of sleep last night. It involved rediculous dreams and sleep walking. What fun!

I first had a horrible dream about the cafe (proof that I am there too much!) In the dream, it was just a regular day, not a busy Sunday or anything. There was a customer who wanted a hazelnut latte, and as I go to make it for them I realize we have no hazelnut flavor, so I go to the cupboard with the flavor syrups to grab a new one. Well, there is none there either... So, I ask if sugar free is ok, and I appologize for not having the regular stuff around. But, of course, there is no sugar free either! What the heck? And there is none in the cupboard either! Not cool. So I am panicking and have no idea what to do. And I just wonder to myself how it is possible to have run out of hazelnut. I am just frantic and the customer leaves because I am too busy freaking out to help her. I felt lame.
It is funny though, because this is not the first time I have had weird dreams about work. I had a dream once that the grinder was broken. I would put the coffee beans in, and they would come out the size of wood chips. I also had a dream in which the pastry order didn't show up for the weekend. I had a dream the volunteers didn't show. All of these dreams I guess can be better classified as nightmares since they leave me with a fast heart rate for too long!

Then I also had a dream last night that I was hanging out at my mother's house and spending the night. I was downstairs in my sister April's room, but in the dream it was my brother Joe's. I can't remember what I was doing, but I fell asleep in his bed. I had slept very restlessly in the dream and for real. I know because this morning my blankets were everywhere, which is very unusual for me. But, in the dream I wanted to call Joe to appologize for making his bed a mess.
This is where the sleep walking came into play. I got out of bed, got my phone, but because it was charging, I just grabbed the charger out of the wall and left the cord in the phone. In the dream though, I called Joe and told him how sorry I was. He didn't care and told me not to worry about it.
But then when I woke up, my phone was in my bed, lots of buttons had been pushed, and I was tangled up in the sheets and blankets of my bed, and the phone charger! I think it is safe to say that I had a restless night.

I have not got for strolls in my sleep in a long time, but I used to all the time. I used to reorganize my room, a mighty feet, but it never looked as good after. I used to get ready for school (and lose all my stuff in the process.) I used to write in my journal, but in the morning it was random words that trailed off into scribbles, and I used to call people. Lots of stuff, but I thought I was over it! I hope this was just a one time thing, I don't like sleep walking, it scares me.

Sunday, wait Mother's Day?

So, I didn't really celebrate Mother's Day yesterday. I sent a card to my mom, but everything considered, I did not go see her. Instead, I worked, then relaxed for a bit before filling the rest of my day with stuff.

I took Logan Ludwig to the driving range yesterday. It was funny because he was giving me crap and saying how there is no way I am really a golfer. When I asked him why that is, he just simply replied by saying, "Your a girl!" Oh yeah, I must have forgotten that girls stay home and cook dinner, clean the house, and take care of the kids while the men go out golfing. My bad.
So, being the very competitive person with no mercy that I am, I watched him hit a few balls with his driver, then pulled out my 9 iron and hit it 150 yards. Not my best since I didn't play much last year and this was my first time going out this year, but still a good shot. I looked at him, gave him a smarmy look, and waited for his reply. It was jaw dropped, "Umm, wow."
That's right Logan, give me a reason so be competitive, and I kick your butt! I can't help that this is the way I am!

Then my little Maddie Ann Ludwig had a Mother's Day dance recital. It was ridiculously cute. It was a mommy and me class. They danced to Itsy Bitsy Teenie Weenie Yellow Polka Dot Bikini. They were dressed in yellow polka dot bikinis and came out with their mommy's holding a towel in front of them. They are around 3 years old, so they proceeded to do a few moves. Like, hands in the air, hands by their faces, spin in a circle... easy stuff. But oh no, not Maddie Ann.
She is show all by herself. The mommy's stood with the kids and sort of directed them, but Maddie would have none of that! She decided that hands on her hips and kicking her feet in the air while running around in the front would be more fun. Then maybe a ballet spin with her arms out would be fun. And last but definitely not least, she ran circles around her mom for a little bit.
I think she had everyone in the audience laughing, a good feet considering the audience was quite large for a recital! I know I had tears from laughing, and I was on the verge of peeing my pants since I didn't go before hand, and Logan was about to fall out of his seat. Needless to say, it was quite amusing.
I am excited to watch the dvd with Audrey since she was busy trying to look like they knew what they were doing on stage instead of watching what was going on! I did a mini reenactment, but it didn't do Maddie Ann justice!
I will see if I can post the video when the dvd comes out.

Anyway, overall, a good day. I got to see many of my favorite church women, and then spent the day with my Ludwig family.
I hope all you moms had a great Mother's Day!

My near death experience

I almost died today. You all could have never heard from me again. My last post would have been all you have to remember me by.... If it had not been for Hunter Ray. He saved my life today. What a hero.

Today I had to go to Target to get a few things, and I brought the boys with. Hunter sat in the front with me, and Cole in the back. We were just on Elton Hills, literally just turned off our street and had the windows down and getting a good song on, when this experience changed my life....


A bee flew in my window and landed in the front pocket of my bag. It was a big nasty bee with a giant stinger. I am not allergic to bees or anything, but my dad is... so maybe I am? But either way, I do not like them. I have been stung by bees countless times and each time I cry a little. What can I say, I am sensitive.
So, I start freaking out and nearly screaming as I see this bee trying to move around in my bag that is still over my shoulder and on the seat right next to me. I am trying to explain to the very distraught looking Hunter what is going on while he watches the road intently making sure that I am not swerving into oncoming traffic.
I finally get the words out that a big nasty bee is stuck in my purse and before I can finish what I am saying he has my bag in his lap and he is smashing it in every possible place for a bee to be hiding. He has zipped up the pocket it was in and just starts whaling on it!
I am by this point out of breath but still finding it in me to crack up at the scene of Hunter beating my bag.
All this time, Cole is in the back seat looking at us as if we are on crack.
This all happened in about a minute, we were no more than a few blocks from the house. And about half way to the light, Hunter slowly opens the pocket to peak in. He then yells "It's still alive!!?!" And zips it up again and this time, he not only smashes, but yells at the bee to die! Keep in mind, we are driving on a busy Elton Hills with our windows down, and people around us are also, like Cole, looking at us like we are a bunch of crazies.
But this time, with all of Hunters yelling and smashing, he killed that stupid bee. He then took it out of my bag and threw it out the window, thus saving my life.

I hope this story inspires you to not take life for granted. Anyday could be our last. Just as today was almost mine.

Fears Freedom and Faith

Three things we all have... Fears, whatever those may be. Freedom, which we have much of. And Faith, whatever that faith might be in, we have it.

I was thinking about my fears the other day, which by the way are rediculous and totally unecessary, but fears none the less. Let me tell you what some of those fears are, you might laugh, you might agree, whatever.

I am super scared of spiders and centipedes (typical). I am afraid of the unknown... just like many of you. I like to know what to expect with every situation. And I am deathly afraid of the water and anything that lives in it. That including sea weed, little fish, turtles, whales, sharks, sea horses, and submarines...
Those are my most serious fears, and like I said, as odd as those may be, are major stressors in my life.
I recently had a bad dream that someone was trying to teach me to surf. We were paddling out into the ocean, going under water as the waves were passing over us. And we were getting further and further out. I was not scared, and I had not looked back... until it was time to turn around and ride a wave back towards shore. We were out so far! It was insane. And I paniced. I looked ahead of me, behind me, and under me. I saw something in the water, it was worse than a shark, whale and submarine combined! I have no idea what it was, but I paddled back to shore as fast as I could. My heart was racing so much I could really feel it. I woke up to a rediculously fast heart rate and cold sweat... not my favorite way to wake up.

In the morning on my way to work is a daily quite time with God, and as I was praying I thought about that dream. I then felt God revealing my freedoms to me.
We have so many freedoms that we never think about. We have the freedom to work a job of our choice, of course that doesn't mean we all enjoy our jobs, but hopefully we do! I have a roof over my head, and a roof of my choice at that! I have the freedom to surf the internet on my personal laptop, the freedom to call or text whoever I want on my cell phone. I have the freedom to talk to who I want and befriend who I want. I have the freedom to dress how I want. Believe in a God that I want, pray how I want, worship how I want, have a home church of my choice. I can go to school if I want, but I have the freedom to not. I can leave this country if I want, and I can come back afterwards if I want.
With these many freedoms though, we get so much stress. We worry about everything don't we?

I really felt God trying to tell me something at this point, but what?

When we put our faith in Him, we give up our worldly freedoms and we gain so much more. We tell God we are His, and we will do what He wants when He wants. We are giving Him total control of our lives. We give up our freedoms, and we hate that don't we? We like control and we like being able to do what we want. But those worldy freedoms are nothing, why hold on to them?

So, what awesome thing happens when we do this? We know that we don't have to worry about the unknown, because God is in control. We can curb all our fears, because with our amazing God in control, what the heck would we have to worry about? When He has our back, we are a whole new kind of free.

This was just something I have been thinking about and wanted to share with you. I hope you enjoyed reading.